Thursday, August 25, 2011

Times are ah-changing!

SO why have I been so MIA?? Well because times are changing and I needed some time to regroup! For the first time in 22 months I’m working! It was a good ride being a SAHM but it was never the long term plan. Without breaking down and sobbing uncontrollably - I’m missing my Hailey baby… I miss waking up to her little sounds in the morning through her monitor and hearing her talk to herself as she lays in her crib…I miss our routine of getting ready and eating breakfast together. I miss sharing my whole day with this crazy energy pack little monkey. I’ve experienced every change and everything that she has learned firsthand, watching her grow amazes me daily and now I’m at work and someone else gets to experience this for me! Worse (although I know she is in a good place) I also know that they have seen a bunch of little ones go through these changes and for them it isn’t quite as magical as it is for me. Needless to say my heart aches as we go through this time of change.

This is ultimately a good change and I know it’s for the better, long term. My monkey isn’t my only priority my other baby is four years away from graduating high school and this means having to save our monies as much as we can. It’s time to be the responsible momma that I have always been and this I’m afraid is no easy task! Our future has all kinds of things in the works and in the present we have to do some wise parenting! Short term this will take some getting used to...

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Riding on Faith

Hello blog world! I know it’s been a while but what can I say? This has been a long week one filled with ups and downs – a little bit more rollercostery than the norm. My heart has been heavy and I haven’t been able to bring my self to write them down. Actually from what I can tell a lot of my fellow gal pals seem to be going through uhm…changes, decisions, life changing kinda things. So without getting too heavy on anyone, a thought came to me the other morning while I was thinking to my self slash chatting to God. You know when things get shaky that kind of conversation tends to pick up…

A few weeks ago my Pastor had a sermon about science and the bible and how sometimes science might discover something that may have been written about long ago . As an example he gave us:

Ecclesiastes 4:12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

Cable barrier is effective at stopping even semi-trucks from crossing the median and entering oncoming traffic.

As I thought about this the other day I thought “I’m glad my seat belt on this rollercoaster is a triple-braided cord” and that no matter how crazy the next few months are (or the next 4 years! As I brace my self for a teenager in high school) it will not give away. In fact I know that the tighter I hold on the more I will over come…

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Invisible Maracas!

One of my favorite things right now is the zumba classes at the gym, they are such an outlet for me because I love to dance and this now combines my love of something with the idea of working-out and makes working-out super fun. Last week we were in the middle of moving our hips to some Salsa music when I noticed one of my gal pals really getting into the rhythm of the music, gone was the instruction of pumping your arms this way and that way. She turned around and looked at me and said we might as well have fun while doing this! Damn right!

If you are a Salsa dancer and you don’t have to be a good one, you know that when you are really into it, your shoulders are rolling to the beat and your arms are keeping you in step. If I could post you a video breaking it down for you I would – too bad I’m not that blog savvy!!!!

Today I was totally following her lead and when Salsa time came around I was like WOO-HOO!! Suddenly I caught my self in the mirror and almost fell out laughing! I was dancing like my -MOMMA! I was taken back some 20 years ago (or more gulp…double gulp!) and we were in one of my moms friends house, the furniture pushed against the walls, floor cleared and music blasting. There in the middle of the floor kickin’ it ole’ school is my momma and her invisible maracas!! Back in the day that’s what I would think when I saw her dance, I must have been 9 or 10 (yes more than 20 yrs ago!) maybe even younger. All the kids would be playing chase running around like crazy or in a room watching T.V. before real dancing even occurred to us. I would be getting something to eat or goofy dancing with the grown-ups and I’d see my mom tearing up the floor, I’d think what the heck is she doing?! It looks like she has invisible maracas in her hands and she is shaking them to the music! I thought she looked silly, the same way I did today! In my defense, isn’t everything retro cool now and days? Therefore so am I!

Monday, August 1, 2011

One of my many hats...

All of us, men included (I suppose), have many hats; we as women are daughters, wives, mothers, chefs, homemakers, business owners or worker bees (or both!), we are sometimes doctors or nurses, some of us are seamstresses (not me but I know some very talented gals). We have many hats and most times wear some of those hats simultaneously. As of late I have found my self wearing my hats and flexing my hat wearing muscles. This past weekend I found myself being stretched as a wife and finding it quite uncomfortable wearing my wife hat (this by the way is one we don’t take off ).

My husband is a mechanic at heart, he was one of those kids who always wanted to know how things worked if they broke there had to be a way to fix it. He has always been in awe of this and never gives up at accepting that something may not have a fixable way. I love him for this and because of the fact that when we came home from our trip to Austin and our AC wasn’t working he (and my brother) were able to fix it within the hour! Yay! Nothing is too small or too big for him to want to figure out, thus why he works on airplanes. When he was younger and his mother had established that he would in fact go to college, she asked him what he wanted to do, when he said he wanted to be an airplane engineer, she couldn’t believe that so much invested and he didn’t want a job where he could be in air-conditioning all day behind a desk. Truth be told he goes stir crazy behind a desk. His favorite stories when he comes home from work are normally about a problem that couldn’t be solved in an airplane and he has had to sit upside down for a few hours until he successfully fixed the problem at hand. He sends my pictures of spaghetti wires that he has to unravel and figure out for the day. Strange strange hubby of mine…

Not to long ago he brought up the subject of doing something else, he wants to try working on cars instead…eek! That wife hat got a little snug. But but but…you have a good career (not just a job!).

Don’t worry y’all he knows cars as well as he knows airplanes. Cars were always his first love when he choose to work on airplane he did so because he wanted to try something different.

In the end after much thought I realized something – I am his wife and he husband. I thought about how many times his husband hat might get a little snug, it might even poke at him sometimes because I am a difficult lady to live with (hello major understatement!!). I realized that many times that I’ve expressed to him my dreams and visions of things I may someday do, he has never expressed to me that they may be un-attainable. He has encouraged me every time and has told me several times to go for it. So casting my worries aside I encouraged him to do it to – go for it! If he dreams of owning his own shop someday where he can daily do something he loves to do, then he should. I think we each should. I feel that there is something that each of us has a passion for and we should at some point in our lives feel completely free to dive in and give it a try. As his wife I’m his biggest cheerleader and encourager and we will deal with the changes as long as God slowly leads the way. I know it might be hard at times and it will make my hat feel a little snug but this is what I signed up for I knew the man I married was this mechanic at heart and I know that nothing makes him happier than spending the day in the garage doing one thing or another so- I’ll wear my hat proudly and do my best to not let it get uncomfortable from time to time.